I am Jen, Jen I am

my journey towards happy and healthy healing…inside and out!

Archive for the tag “healthy-living”

I’m in no hurry

It has been a long time since I have written an “embracing the turtle” post.  There may be times when my head is a bit thick and it takes me entirely too long to get it.

I went out for a walk yesterday morning. I was meeting my friend out on the bikepath and we met at 6am. On my first official day of summer, I was up and out the door by 6am.   I took my silly Lucy walking with me this morning.

We both needed this walk. I have been totally absent from the gym for like the last month and for at least the last two weeks I have been plagued with allergies and upper respiratory infections and not getting any relief due to the mold at school.

Anyhoo…

This walk was just what I needed.

We walked for about 40 minutes. At an averagely slow pace. Lucy has not had a ton of practice in her harness and on the leash.  Lucy had a great walk.

We did it again today. Today was much more humid and a tad warmer which was harder on my healing lungs. I think I am doing better but then I go out and walk and my lungs remind me. I am not sure why I am still suffering….I am taking a 24 hour allegra twice a day. What gives!??!?

But ya know what?!?

I still enjoyed my walk. I will do it again. Hopefully, most mornings this summer. Because Lucy is all black she doesn’t like to be in the sun for too long so this mama needs to get her furbaby out early. If you know me, you know I don’t like early! 😉

I am realizing something from these walks. And from my new way of eating.

I have not been listening to my body.

I have not been properly taking care of my body.

I have not honored my mind or my body recently.

I had a funk, then I got sick. I have been eating better but these walks showed me I need to take care of my body….especially my knee and ankle. Because, seriously, what was the point of surgery and pain and recovery and physical therapy if I am just gonna let it all go to shit.

I was doing good when I was getting to the gym and I was using my muscles. I was doing well.  I was on my way to succeeding when my head totally got it the way. I started to doubt and not feel right and then my funk forced me to stay away from the gym. I just couldn’t do it. I couldn’t make myself so I didn’t.

Then I got sick.

And I stayed away from the gym some more.

Now, I am starting to feel better but I still don’t want to go to the gym. I don’t know what I want but I know its not a “be a badass” in the gym sort of thing. I want to feel better, really better. I am still congested and my lungs feel heavy. I want to be gentler.

I want to be gentler.

I want to take care of me gently.

I want to find the things I really enjoy doing for physical (and mental) fitness and not the things I should be doing.

So, I guess you could say I had a sort of a-ha moment out there on my bike path walk.

I am in no hurry.

I want to find what make my body and spirit happy. I want to heal my lungs and my ankle/knee truly.

I am in no hurry, I don’t have to to rush.

Baby steps.

Slow and steady will win this race!

I will be happy just being Jen.

Heck, I am happy just being Jen…I just have to remember that!!

I have not been exercising. at. all. I have valid reasons…I mean it is hard to work out when you can’t breathe. And there were days when just making it through the day at school was all I could manage. There were days where I thought I had ear infections in both ears and my head might literally explode.  The stairs to my classroom…don’t even ask!! I had to suffer through school – last few weeks are always the busiest. I had a grant to write on top of my normal teaching duties. Oh, and all those weeks I needed off after surgery left me depleted on sick days.

ahhh such is life.

I did a really good ob on my eating. Eliminating wheat has been a very good thing for me. It has forced me to pay attention to what I am eating and what I have in the house. I am making much more conscious choices. I am eating good food. I am enjoying food, all about the food – the prep and the planning and the preparing. I am learning to

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weighing in, #WW week 10

The scale: 

This week: 226.4

Last week: 229.4

Change:  -3

Total Loss: -5.6

The Reaction and the Reflection: 

oh yeah baby!!

that’s what I’m talkin’ bout!!

This week I focused on tracking.  I tracked more than just my WW points. I also tracked my calories using myfitnesspal (MFP) – not for calorie counting purposes but to know what my protein, carbs, fats, and fiber count/percentage is each day. I know I need to eat more protein while I am on the NROLFW plan but I was not sure how much protein I was actually eating every day. I have also been thinking about the amount of carbs I have in my diet…and fiber.  I am starting to think, when it comes to tracking, I need more than simple WW points.  I NEED my WW meetings; they have come to mean so much…plus, the scale may be an issue if I had to deal with it on my own. I like that I step on the scale but I don’t have to see the scale…it isn’t the important part of this journey!

The Lesson: 

This week’s meeting was all about ANCHORS.

Why did we start Weight Watchers? one lady told her roller coaster story…the day she sat on the bench, telling her son she was tired and didn’t want to ride the roller coaster, when in fact she feared not fitting on the roller coaster.

Why do we attend the Saturday, 10:30am meeting? Friendship, this meeting is like a family…so many of the member are longstanding members, in many different places on their journeys.

Do we have an anchor? On a boat, an anchor is used to keep the boat from drifting away. The anchor keeps the boat in its place, only letting the boat stray so far before stopping it.

My sportID bracelet is engraved with the words, “make each say better than the day before” and this helps me remember to take it all one day at a time. One lady talked about a picture she took just this morning…she took a picture of an old pair of underwear from 100+pounds ago with her current underwear on top of the old pair…this was her anchor…a strong visual reminder why she is on this journey.  Some of the ladies mentioned their WW 10% keychains or 25-pound disc as an anchor.

I think I will look for the perfect anchor….maybe a charm for my pandora-style bracelet since I wear that nearly every day.

What is your anchor?

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